Comeuppance, Part 1

The Amazing Catwoman:

The Amazing Catwoman:

I admit it: I do reckless things. It’s one of the qualities that make me good at my job. It also gets me in to trouble, and I have realised this last world-hopping jaunt, the one where I kind of forgot who I was at the end, has landed me in a heap of trouble in Fair Fucking Elfland. Clutie was all full of dire warnings about temporal rifts and OMG THE WHOLE UNIVERSE OUT OF BALANCE, and of course the whole Incident got escalated to her. And I admit that I myself have not remained untouched, but I’m not really talking about that.

I was out roaming in the Unseelie Forest, as you do.

I was out roaming in the Unseelie Forest, as you do.

I was out roaming in the Unseelie Forest, as you do. And I felt something, something shimmering just out of reach. As, you know, you do. I was glad I had my new bow on me: I managed to sneak away to this faire held by the Fantasy Collective, and I couldn’t resist it. My new armour comes from there as well.

Then something changed, though I couldn't have told you what it was at the time.

Then something changed, though I couldn’t have told you what it was at the time.

Then something changed, though I couldn’t have told you what it was at the time. Feathers appeared in my hair though, almost never a good sign. At least they were white and not black. Black might indicate ravens, and I think having to deal with Nemaine right now would destroy whatever confidence I have left.

Speaking of left—should I go that way?

Speaking of left—should I go that way?

Speaking of left—should I go that way? Hm. Another weirdness: usually I know what direction things are in, just sort of naturally. Left, I thought, would take me toward the river that separates the Unseelie lands from the Seelie half of the forest. Like a lot of Fae, I’m of mixed heritage, though I prefer the Unseelie lands: there’s less prejudice, less name calling, and of course I’m less likely to run in to her. Why I’m seemingly the only person in Faerie who doesn’t trust her, I couldn’t tell you. And it’s not that she’s a bad person; it’s just that she’s the Queen, and you cannot fucking trust Fae royalty; that I know with certainty.

Or ... should I go right?

Or … should I go right?

Or… should I go right? I couldn’t decide; it was very frustrating. But I heard the sound of a waterfall in that direction: fuck. I was definitely turned around. Toward the waterfall would be toward the Seelie lands, wouldn’t it?

There was something else in that direction, though: a different kind of mist than we have here, the sort that burns off in the morning and makes you wet through to whatever you’re wearing beneath your —wait. My armour changed, too. Well, this couldn’t be good, even if the armour was, wow. Well fitting and perfectly coloured for my skin, and leaves in my hair, a long tunic with just the right amount of sway…. and comfy boots, my goddess, comfy boots.

Wow…I heard music, tinny and upbeat, with drums I’ve come to associate with more ‘modern’ realms. But in Faerie, I shouldn’t be able to perceive that stuff. A van. Shouting. Someone asleep in the driver’s seat. I shook my head. That’s just leftover stuff from one of those realms, I told myself. I’m not that girl. But I really have to go back to Russell: he’ll be so upset when he wakes up and I’m not there. We were going to Cornwall. Cornwall. What a funny name for a place. Does it actually have walls made of corn?

And then, like the chiming of a bell in my head that rang straight down into my heart, it came.

And then, like the chiming of a bell in my head that rang straight down into my heart, it came.

And then, like the chiming of a bell in my head that rang straight down into my heart, it came.

Geas. Fuck. I was being summoned. But I can’t leave Russell. But I must. She did it. She called me to the fucking Seelie Residence.

Just then, I was about as far away from anywhere I wanted to be as one pointy-eared Fae can get.

You have got to be fucking kidding me.

You have got to be fucking kidding me.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” I said.

“No joke, and do please try to control your tongue, Tacey,” said Nathaniel. He’s her new husband. He’s so goddamn nice, he’s hard to be around. Not to mention very easy on the eyes, that Nathaniel. But I can’t afford to lust after her consort: even though we Fae don’t have this thing about owning our lovers that many mortals do, my life is complicated enough already without a sexy redheaded vampire in it. Big mental X on that.

TAC, I repeated, for the umpteenth time. It's TAC.

TAC, I repeated, for the umpteenth time. It’s TAC.

“TAC,” I repeated for the umpteenth time. “It’s TAC”.

“No, TAC, I am not kidding you,” Nathaniel said. Fucking over cultured English arse. “You will be checking tickets for tonight’s banquet, and you will wear the Queen’s colours while you do it, and you will be polite and personable, and you will ensure that our guests have no fears or concerns about what might be occurring outside that door.”

“I’m bouncing at a Royal banquet?”

“That you are. And for the next three weeks, you’ll stay here in Faerie, and you’ll have a long talk with Dyisi about how reckless and dangerous to our Realm your recent activities have been. Do I make myself clear?”

“Crystal,” I replied, because I couldn’t think of anything better to say.

“Good,” he replied and he didn’t give me another look, not for a long time. And that was just as well, because then Clutie put me in the Queen’s Knight clothes. Which are perfectly serviceable, except they make me look like a fucking Court Jester. The only thing that makes this outfit worth wearing is this fucking amazing polearm. She might want us to look like courtiers, but she knows where to import weapons. This spear comes from MacMoragh & Museand it may be the most beautiful weapon I’ve ever held. Not giving up the bow, but shit, if you have to have a spear, this is the one you want.

All in all, the evening was a simple job, except for this one woman, Cherish Gelato. And may I just say what a stupid fucking name that is? Cherish Gelato? Are you a woman or a dessert? Make up your mind!

Anyway, Ms. Gelato did not want to surrender her ticket because it had the Queen’s signature on it. What an imbecile. A document, any kind of document, with the Queen’s signature on it is powerful, and sometimes she forgets to enchant them so they’re useless. So her knights, her fucking Guards, have to inspect every ticket. Cherish Gelato’s turned out to be unenchanted and therefore very powerful magic that we absolutely cannot allow to go home with her.

And she pitched a goddamn fit. Oh, it was a souvenir. Oh, she’d cherish (see what I did there?) it always. Oh, it would go on her wall in a place of honour. Oh, she’d hide it away in a safe. Oh, she might sell it on eBay….

Yeah. No.

It took half the guests staring her down and Nathaniel backing me up to get her to surrender that stupid little piece of paper. “I don’t know what the problem is,” the Queen said when she finally showed up, “Cherish Gelato easily has a dozen signed photos of me. She doesn’t need an invitation, too.”

Ms. Cherish Gelato, refusing to surrender her ticket.

Ms. Cherish Gelato, refusing to surrender her ticket.

Finally, with Nathaniel, Dyisi (whom I’m trying to avoid, frankly), a very convincing Fae Bard called Maeve, and Sabre, a visiting Unseelie Royal Sidhe who seems to have some diplomatic standing, all standing over her, she was convinced to hand the damn thing over.

This? Is going to be the longest three weeks of my life.

Group photo, from left to right:
Mikachu, Wren, Nathaniel, The Amazing Catwoman, Sabre (in the back), Dyisi, Cherish, and Maeve.
Thanks to my amazing and patient rp friends who let me take nearly an hour to put this photograph together.

Style Cards:

TAC Roaming the Unseelie Forest:
Skin
: 7 Deadly s{K}ins, Andrea (the NEW B UNIQUE skin, available at the 7 Deadly s{K}ins Main Store)
Body: Maitreya Lara
Eyes: Gauze, Paradox Cat Eyes
Ears: Gauze, High Elf Ear
Ring: Aisling, The Good Wife
Bow: Storybook, Heartseeker Bow (Available at The Fantasy Collective)
Boots: Gauze, BP Swift Boots, Fantasy
Hair: Homage, Frenchie Redux, Lohans
Clothes: The White Armory, Woodland Guardian Tunic Set (Available at The Fantasy Collective)
Necklace: Otherskin, Selene

TAC Under the Arch:
Skin
: 7 Deadly s{K}ins, Andrea (the NEW B UNIQUE skin, available at the 7 Deadly s{K}ins Main Store)
Body: Maitreya Lara
Eyes: Gauze, Paradox Cat Eyes
Ears: Gauze, High Elf Ear
Ring: Aisling, The Good Wife
Bow: Storybook, Heartseeker Bow (Available at The Fantasy Collective)
Clothes: Wicca’s Wardrobe, Nirenil Outfit, Woodland (Available at The Fantasy Collective)
Hair: AII (the ugly and beautiful), Forest Witch Hair V2 With Feathers (Available at The Fantasy Collective)
Torc: The Forge, Torc, Ultra-Rare
Headpiece: Wicca’s Wardrobe, Laerlorn Headpiece, Summer (Available at The Fantasy Collective)
Boots: Lassitude & Ennui, Endenion Boots, Brown/Gold

TAC as a Queen’s Knight:
Skin
: 7 Deadly s{K}ins, Andrea (the NEW B UNIQUE skin, available at the 7 Deadly s{K}ins Main Store)
Body: Maitreya Lara
Eyes: Gauze, Paradox Cat Eyes
Ears: Gauze, High Elf Ear
Ring: Aisling, The Good Wife
Tunic: SenzaFine, Beriawen Tunic (Available at The Fantasy Collective)
Necklace: Alegria, Dragon Scale Necklace, Silver
Hair: Mina, Lena/ Guusje (long) Mina (windblown, in the group photo)
Boots: Gauze, BP Swift Boots, Naturals
Spear: MacMoragh & Muse, Obara’s Spear (NEW at the MacMoragh & Muse Main Store and not on MP yet)

Group Photo Style Cards:


Wren:
Hair
: *ARGRACE RYO -Golden Blonde
Ears
: *~*Illusions*~* Fairy Ears
Eyes
: InkHeart Dorian Eyes-Bottle
Rat: Alchemy-Rat Familiar-Brown
Boots: Cazimi Eben Boots-Brown
Wings: Faeline Fairy Wings-Youoko-Lime
Shape: oddbAlls’ FINN Shape for Girl Child
Pants: the Lounge- Medieval Lounge Pants-Burlap DkBrown
Tunic: {Exalted} Woodland Strider-Tunic-Green
Belt: {Exalted} Ranger-Belt

Nathaniel:
Body – MA Designs Complete Avatar, Riley 1
Skin – DNA Damien Type 1
Hair – Wasabi Pils Orion Mesh Hair (Cinnamon)
Eyes – Ikon Sunrise eyes, Verdigris
Clothing – [S] James Pants and Boots, .Luminary. Henry Top

Sabre:
Wasabi Pills Erik Mesh Hair.
Zed Mesh fur lined Black Goth Strap Boots
Zed Mesh Goth Distressed Black full Length Coat
Zed Mesh Lace-up Leather straight leg Pants

Cherish:
Skin: 7 Deadly s{K}ins, Daisey, Apricot (Rare)
Hair: Olive, The Daisy Hair (Rare)
Dress: Aphorism, Inanna Dress, Vine, White
Coat: Aphorism, Inanna Coat, Ebony
Necklace: Le Forme, Aegon Necklace, Butterfly, Gold

Dyisi:
Skin – Plastik Astrali Basic Vaaliarah
Hair – little bones. Shaaswat
Hands – Slink Mesh Casual
Tattoos: .ARISE. – Maori Facetattoo
Tiki Tattoo – Bora
Plastik – Asaia Markings
Jalwa – Kheleeji Swirl
Top: [RA] Fashonista Scarf in White
Pants: Artizana Sari Pants in Indigo
Jewelery: Kibitz – Tulip Nose Chain
Zaara [Goa Party] – Baga Nose Ring
Friendship bracelets
Retro sunglasses *silver-blu*
Schnadenfreude – Long Water and Earth necklaces
Earthstones – Tumbled Stone Necklace (Rasta)
Belly Crystal -Amethyst
.:ellabella:. – Xerim’s Conundrum
RO: Hipster Bag – Coffee
~Soedara~ – Pearl Berjuang Tari Bindi (Silver)
Goat parts: [Gauze] – Faun hooves
Illusions – Nivicola horns (Runes)
Shape: Self Made
Staff of Doom: Self Made

Maeve:
TWA Bravado Gown
.::S::. Zania Grey Hair
Elizabeth by RUBY Skins (old lady skin)
CCD- Luxury Optical- Victorian Lace

Spiffy photos taken with the indispensible aid of my LumiPro. I never leave home without it!

What I Did After My Summer Holiday, by The Amazing Catwoman

The Amazing Catwoman:

The Amazing Catwoman:

Well, first of all, those fuckers in New Brighton fired me after one night on the job without so much as a “fuck you very much, TAC.” Fucking vamps. I mean, at least you’d think a crowd like that would be up to date on whether or not women could be badasses, but no; I was too small, not intimidating enough, why on earth would anybody hire a little girl like me as a bouncer, blah, blah, blah, she’ll be somebody’s ghoul by tomorrow midnight, blah-ti-blah. Fuck you, vampires of New Brighton.

So they sent me to Ironwood Hills, because there was apparently a ghost problem.

So they sent me to Ironwood Hills, because there was apparently a ghost problem.

So they sent me to Ironwood Hills, because there was apparently a ghost problem. I mean, seriously. Ghosts? Fine, fine, fine. I loaded up with anti-ghost herbs and took the notes from the fixer. It was a weird realm jump: I materialised outside a fucking cemetery over a sewer drain, and the steam was godawful. Well, fine. I’m not one to be a complete idiot, as I’m sure you know by now, so instead of heading immediately into the cemetery, I got suited up, then made my way into town to find out what was going on from the locals.

Town, wouldn't you know it, was deserted.

Town, wouldn’t you know it, was deserted.

Town, wouldn’t you know it, was deserted. It was a ghost town. (See what I did there?) So I sat on the steps with an abandoned teddy bear and planned my next move.

As it turned out, most of the houses were boarded up: this one even had the word HAUNTED on it in big letters.

As it turned out, most of the houses were boarded up: this one even had the word HAUNTED on it in big letters.

As it turned out, most of the houses were boarded up: this one even had the word HAUNTED on it in big letters. Of course, everything was fine until I actually did hear a loud moaning sound coming from…. well, from everywhere, really.

I took off at a run to see what there was to see in the rest of the town.

I took off at a run to see what there was to see in the rest of the town.

I took off at a run to see what there was to see in the rest of the town.

These things always have a source. That moaning continued, though, from just fucking everywhere. It was unnerving. It would stop, then start again, like a crazy sentient wind. Once I got further into town, I noticed signs for a carnival. Oh, great. Carnivals are hotbeds for weirdness, so I figured it’d be worth checking out as a possible source of the trouble.

When I got to the carnival site, I was gobsmacked.

When I got to the carnival site, I was gobsmacked.

When I got to the carnival site, I was gobsmacked. It was half full of water, there were crows everyfuckingwhere, all this stuff looked like it had been dilapidated for decades, as did the rest of the town, really, and you don’t even want to know about the creepy dolls: those little things are seriously unnerving.

Then, a freaky thing happened: a rift opened in the sky, I kid you not. And I fucking froze. My heart rate went up, there was a pounding in my head and my ears rang and all my nerves started to tingle, and I knew, just knew, that I had to get away from there, and fast. Fuck my fee, fuck the job: there was no saving Ironwood Hills. As a realm, it is a goner, there is nobody here except creepy dolls and a strange brigade of little children playing in the refuse, and just forget the whole thing, I was running. Out of there. Fast.

Then, everything went dark.

Then, everything went dark.

Then, everything went dark. Only I was still frozen in place. Fucking paralysed. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before; what the fucking fuck. I know, I know, I’m cursing too much. Blame her: She made me a potty mouth.

Dizzy, dizzy, dizzy, and then blackness.

And I woke up on a fucking beach.

And I woke up on a fucking beach.

And I woke up on a fucking beach. On a beautiful day. With my heart still pounding. I wasn’t wearing my same clothes, and something had gone crazy with my hair, and there was one of those floaty planes—what are those things called, anyway—over the sea.

When I looked in the other direction, sharks. I started to get dizzy again.

When I looked in the other direction, sharks. I started to get dizzy again.

When I looked in the other direction, sharks. I started to get dizzy again. Great. This was just fucking great.

Then I remembered an old trick the Gypsy Davey taught me, and I reached for my shadow.

Then I remembered an old trick the Gypsy Davey taught me, and I reached for my shadow.

Then I remembered an old trick the Gypsy Davey taught me, and I reached for my shadow. Take me, take me, out of this place. Take me away, lady goddess.

Then, with dizziness and bonus nausea, not to mention a feeling of constriction everywhere, I found myself in some kind of mediaeval castle.

Then, with dizziness and bonus nausea, not to mention a feeling of constriction everywhere, I found myself in some kind of mediaeval castle.

Then, with dizziness and bonus nausea, not to mention a feeling of constriction everywhere, I found myself in some kind of mediaeval castle. There were lutes playing. Servants quietly scurried around with their eyes on the floor. Nobody remarked on my sudden appearance: they just all said, “My Lady” whenever I passed them. “My Lady” would like a fucking dirty martini with extra olive juice, thank you very much.

I did not much like this world.

I did not much like this world.

I did not much like this world. It seemed to me that if this was some alternate life for me, I would be a very bored “Lady”. And half a dozen people explained to me that the purple of my dress complimented the red of my hair, which had been bound up in some admittedly impressive braid thing. The one thing I’d have loved to take away from this existence, which frankly reminded me all too much of her, was the necklace I found around my neck when I materialised. Such a beautiful thing. Perhaps I’ll see if… no. I am not taking any more favours from her than I have to. And why was I here, anyway? What possible impulse could have lead my shadow to bring me to such a place, unless it was just looking for something as far away as possible from a beach? I did note, when I looked out this window, that we were absurdly high, on some impossible peak. The castle seemed accessible only by a bridge that it would have been impossible to cross even on horseback. I did not waste much time wondering how supplies got in: enough of the servants were sporting pointy ears for me to imagine this must be some sort of an elfin or faerie kingdom. Still, it was terrifying to be on a beach one minute and then trussed up in a corseted dress the next. Ugh. I reached for my shadow again.

OMG, that day was so horrible.

OMG, that day was so horrible.

OMG, this day is so horrible. Late night / early morning mist, and my dad shouting from the doorway and my mum looking out the kitchen window and crying, but fuck them. Rusty and I are going to Cornwall to surf and live a life like God intended people to live, free and not tied down to stupid parents.

And my dad yelling,

And my dad yelling, “I knew that little arse was trouble from the first time he came driving up here in that hippie van!”

And my dad yelling, “I knew that little arse was trouble from the first time he came driving up here in that hippie van!” And the fight going on and on and the mist burning off and Rusty just lying down to sleep in the back of the VW because he didn’t want to deal with my parents, and me fighting my way into the house again to grab a few things: I mean, how is a girl meant to survive without an iPhone, anyway?

And my dad stormed out of the house to work, and my mum just stood there crying, and all of a sudden all I could think of was being a little girl again.

And my dad stormed out of the house to work, and my mum just stood there crying, and all of a sudden all I could think of was being a little girl again.

And my dad storms out of the house to work, and my mum just stands there crying, and all of a sudden all I can think of is being a little girl again.

And I’m overwhelmed by this sense of loss, and Rusty finally gets fed up with waiting and starts the engine, and so I turn to get in…

And everything starts spinning.

And everything starts spinning.

And everything starts spinning, and nothing makes sense, and I see stars and have to grab for the van’s open window so I won’t fall over….

And then I find myself jerked abruptly away, and that life spins in tatters away from me.

And then I find myself jerked abruptly away, and that life spins in tatters away from me.

And then I find myself jerked abruptly away, and that life spins in tatters away from me. I land with a thump on her fucking altar, in the middle of the Great Seelie Forest, surrounded by giggling demifae and gossipy little will o’ the wisps, and it’s late morning and I’m stark fucking naked, not that it matters here, but what the fuck just happened to me?

I stretch and try to stand.

I stretch and try to stand.

I stretch and try to stand. “Don’t do that, Tacey,” says Clutie—you’d guess she’d be around, it being her domain and all. “You’ve had quite a shock. We’ll get a healer to you soon as we can: we think you’ve had a panic attack and spun yourself round several realms on your way back home.”

“This is not my home,” I snap, and it’s “Tac, not Tacey.” I fucking hate that name. “Tacey” means “quiet”. I mean, seriously. I am not Tacey. I am The Amazing Catwoman. Tac.

I try to stand up anyway and end up losing my balance and falling backwards.

I try to stand up anyway and end up losing my balance and falling backwards.

I try to stand up anyway and end up losing my balance and falling backwards. “Whose crap is this on the altar, anyway?” I mutter as I fall. But when you’re in the Magnificent Fae Queen’s back garden, there are always demifae ready to catch you when you fall over, even if they pull the shit out of your hair.

“Fine,” Clutie says, and there’s a hiss in her breath. “Tac, then, and it might not be home but we think you ought to stay for a little while, just until you get your realm-walking feet back. We’ll take you to see Dyisi if you want, though our healers can repair most of the damage.” Her voice softens as they settle me back down onto the altar. “It’s leftovers, by the way, from the Queen’s handfasting. It was just last week.”

“Oh, great,” I groan. “All this and I have to put up with her married bliss on top of everything else?”

“Oh, do calm down, Tacey—Tac,” she corrects herself before I can correct her. “So you don’t like Faerie. Well, you’re going to stay here for a little while, so shut your gob and get used to it.” Wow, she’s as bad as my dad back in…. what was the name of that town again?

“I was somebody else,” I say quietly.

“Probably several somebodies,” Clutie replies as if I’ve done the universe some great harm. “Now settle yourself, ground and centre, and let us help you.”

What happened to me?

What happened to me?

What happened to me? I rise up on my toes, breathe in the (admittedly) sweet air of Faerie, and let my feet feel the altar, the altar to the Earth, the earth to the Water, the water to the Sky, the sky to the sun, the sun to the great initiator, Fire. The sun of Faerie is like nowhere else, and I bathe in it, breathe it in, let myself go calm. I was a savage on a beach. I was a queen in a castle. I was a teenage girl running away from home. And for just a moment, goddess knows how long it’ll last, this does feel like home. I just hope I don’t have to deal too much with her.H

Style Cards

Hair Fair is opening as I write this, and the sensational Queue Marlow has outdone herself with this year’s offerings from Analog DogThe Amazing Catwoman is wearing all the new Hair Fair styles, plus one style that’s new in the Analog Dog Main Store, in this post. There’s also some great stuff from The Season’s Story and Oh My Gacha as well: check out the detail style cards below for lists and links!

Ironwood Hills, first photo:
Body: Maitreya
Skin: 7 Deadly s{K}ins, Tavia v1 Natural RARE (Available at Oh My Gacha!)
Hair: Analog Dog (natch!) Theresa (New at the Analog Dog Main Store!)
Ears: Gauze, High Elf Ears
Clothes: Faida, Jeanne, Brown
Boots: Lassitude & Ennui, Hellebore Boots, Brown
Eyes: Avatar Bizarre, Cheshire Cat Gold
Necklace: Otherskin, Selene, Black
Ring: Aisling, The Good Wife

Ironwood Hills, Subsequent Photos:
Body: 
Maitreya
Skin: 
7 Deadly s{K}ins, Tavia v1 Natural RARE (Available at Oh My Gacha!)
Hair: 
Analog Dog (natch!) Theresa (New at the Analog Dog Main Store!)
Ears: 
Gauze, High Elf Ears
Eyes: Avatar Bizarre, Cheshire Cat Gold
Ring: Aisling, The Good Wife
Necklace: Otherskin, Selene, Black
Clothes: Fashionably Dead Designs, Cirilla (blouse, boots, corset, and pants)

Timeless Memories (beach) Photos:
Body: 
Maitreya
Skin: 
7 Deadly s{K}ins, Tavia v1 Natural RARE (Available at Oh My Gacha!)
Hair: 
Analog Dog (natch!) Sassafras (New at Hair Fair!)
Ears: 
Gauze, High Elf Ears
Eyes: Avatar Bizarre, Cheshire Cat Gold
Ring: 
Aisling, The Good Wife
Necklace: 
Otherskin, Selene, Black
Clothes: 
Fashionably Dead Designs, Cheeky Ranger (Tunic, Boots)
Tights: Izzie’s Cozy Tights
Tattoo: White Widow, Tombstone (At AnyBody)

Castle Photos:
Body: Maitreya
Skin: 
7 Deadly s{K}ins, Tavia v1 Natural RARE (Available at Oh My Gacha!)
Hair: Analog Dog (natch!) Molly (New at Hair Fair!)
Ears: 
Gauze, High Elf Ears
Eyes: Avatar Bizarre, Cheshire Cat Gold
Ring: 
Aisling, The Good Wife
Necklace: 
Otherskin, Salvation (At Fair Play!)
Dress: Les Encantades, Grace (At the Medieval Faire!)

Suburban England Photos:
Body: 
Maitreya
Skin: 
7 Deadly s{K}ins, Tavia v1 Natural RARE (Available at Oh My Gacha!)
Hair: 
Analog Dog (natch!) Psylocibin (New at Hair Fair!)
Eyes: IKON, Destiny Eyes, Moor
Skirt: Wimey, Dark Denim Skirt RARE (At The Season’s Story!)
Tops: Wimey, Summer of Fandom Gacha commons (At The Season’s Story!)
Minivan: Bad Unicorn Clothing, “Prop” Summah Minivan RARE (At The Season’s Story!)
House: Breno, The Smith House (At The Fantasy Collective!)

Great Seelie Forest Photos:
Body: Maitreya
Skin: 
7 Deadly s{K}ins, Tavia v1 Natural RARE (Available at Oh My Gacha!)
Hair: 
Analog Dog (natch!) Sassafras (New at Hair Fair!)
Ears: 
Gauze, High Elf Ears
Eyes: Avatar Bizarre, Cheshire Cat Gold
Ring: 
Aisling, The Good Wife
Necklace: 
Otherskin, Selene, Black
Stone Circle: Artisan Fantasy, Maiden Tor Stone Circle
Trumpet Mushrooms: Cerridwen’s Cauldron
Flower Field: The Looking Glass, Ichi Fields

Locations:
Ironwood Hills, a beautifully creepy sim with open rez-rights, is a fantastic location for photography and just to explore. There’s loads to see, so go back often, and pass a few Lindens their way: it costs money to keep a sim open of course, and making it available to the public like this is such a beautiful gift.
Timeless Memories, fairly recently redesigned with a Mediterranean flair, is a gorgeous place both to visit and to photograph. I’m sure I’ll be back and grab more than just a few beach photos to scare TAC with sharks!
Skye Neist Point, part of the Studio Skye sims, is one of my favourite places to go when I need gorgeous landscapes and beautiful buildings. Studio Skye will also make you long to design your own forests and gardens with their meticulously and elegantly designed landscapes.

Other Locations: The suburban street was built in a sandbox, because I couldn’t find anything out in the Wide Second World that met my needs for this part of The Amazing Catwoman’s journey, and of course the Great Seelie Forest is part of Wicked Wylds, a private, invite-only roleplaying sim that invites good writers who want to create great characters.

Spiffy photos taken with the indispensible aid of my LumiPro. I never leave home without it!

Miracles

The Amazing Catwoman:

The Amazing Catwoman:

I said I never wanted my holiday to end. Truth is, I hadn’t taken a break in so long, I just extended it. For nearly a month. And I’m not even out of money yet. I guess that’s what happens when you do the sort of work I do.

Yeah: don’t ask what sort of work I do.

I spent a lot of time just enjoying the wilderness.

I spent a lot of time just enjoying the wilderness.

I spent a lot of time just enjoying the wilderness. This place was really off the beaten path: you can only get to it by boat, in fact, and I spent one really lovely afternoon just soaking up a hazy summer day, watching and listening to birds, and, believe it or not, reading. I know I said I’m not into books, but there’s this series I discovered that’s got me totally hooked, by some American girl named Seanan McGuire. Usually, books about contemporary Fae written by ordinary people, well. They’re fanciful, good for a laugh. But this author really has her head together, and honest to gods, she gets it right. Most of the time.

And then, wouldn't you know it. I started thinking.

And then, wouldn’t you know it. I started thinking.

And then, wouldn’t you know it, I started thinking. It wasn’t the book: the book was a fun read, but– or maybe it was the book. I want my life, my work, to matter.

I figured that as I ended my holiday I’d go back and check out some of the other places I love to go.

I went back to It All Starts With A Smile.

I went back to It All Starts With A Smile.

I must have sat there and just listened to the surf for hours. I keep meaning to go back and investigate the valley, but something about the sea just calls me. Those choppy waves, a craggy shore. Not a boring beach or, no sand and surf: there’s something about the desolation of a rocky beach that draws me.

I hitched a ride with a guy in an old truck back to L'Arc en Ciel.

I hitched a ride with a guy in an old truck back to L’Arc en Ciel.

He ran out of the truck as soon as we arrived to make some deliveries, but he’d left a box in the back of the truck, so I lifted it to carry it to him. He thanked me for helping and then handed me a little warm parcel. “For your trouble,” he said.

And then the parcel started rocking in my hands. I tore away the cloth cover to discover that I was holding a large egg.

Inside of which…

...was a dragon!

…was a dragon!

…was a dragon! Not a big dragon, mind, though I have no idea how big the little fellow will get.

He is so lovely! And he settles on my shoulder and hovers just above me most of the time. I’m calling him Kermit. I don’t know why: it just seemed like a nice name for a dragon.

When I turned around to thank the old guy, he, and the truck, were gone. I never heard them drive off.

When I turned around to thank the old guy, he, and the truck, were gone. I never heard them drive off.

When I turned around to thank the old guy, he, and the truck, were gone. I never heard them drive off. I must have looked a right idiot, leaning forward to prop on the truck’s door and thank the guy. Luckily we weren’t closer to the edge of the dock or I’d have fallen in and people around would have thought I was swimming for the lighthouse!

Here we are, Kermit and me, in front of the market sign.

Here we are, Kermit and me, in front of the market office.

Here we are, Kermit and me, in front of the market office.

I made my way over to my old digs, telling him all about the great fried chicken place right next door. He seemed as excited as I was.

But when we got there, the fried chicken shop was closed!

But when we got there, the fried chicken shop was closed!

I’m sure I swore quite a bit, but I don’t think Kermit minded.

Then I turned and noticed that the tattoo shop was closed too.

Then I turned and noticed that the tattoo shop was closed too.

Then I turned and noticed that the tattoo shop was closed too. In fact, it looked abandoned. Deserted. I walked back to the chicken shop and found grime on the windows and everything inside was in disarray, stuff strewn about on the floor, chairs and tables knocked over. How strange.

I guess I’d been completely oblivious, which is totally unlike me, on my way to the chicken shop, busily talking to Kermit about how great the chicken was. I don’t know if he understood me, but he sort of chirped and mrrped along, so I figured he at least likes — wow, how do you tell if a  dragon is a boy or a girl, anyway? — I figured he at least likes conversation.

Then, we had a look at the deserted street from the other end.

Then, we had a look at the deserted street from the other end.

Children's toys just left out in the street.

Children’s toys just left out in the street.

And air of finality and desolation about everything.

And air of finality and desolation about everything.

I couldn’t believe I’d just walked past some of this stuff, intent on getting city fried chicken, without noticing things like a car in the middle of the road with the door opened, the overturned gas truck, the empty shops.

Just outside the town limit, we even saw a deserted tractor.

Just outside the town limit, we even saw a deserted tractor.

Just outside the town limit, we even saw a deserted tractor. And across the water, the church I’d danced in front of just a few weeks ago … looked like no-one had been there in ages.

Even the beautiful church looked deserted.

Even the beautiful church looked deserted.

This sign, outside of town, always moved me.

This sign, outside of town, always moved me.

This sign, outside of town, always moved me.

It's one of the few things I have in common with *her*.

It’s one of the few things I have in common with *her*.

It’s one of the few things I have in common with her. She was amazed by this sign as well. I think it might have something to do with their strange religion.

And I got the call to go to my next assignment, which is in New Brighton of all places, talking of beaches. And boardwalks.

So we said goodbye to L'Arc en Ciel, probably for the last time.

So we said goodbye to L’Arc en Ciel, probably for the last time.

So we said goodbye to L’Arc en Ciel, probably for the last time.

Goodbye, L’Arc en Ciel. And thank you a million times to Asa Vordun for making such a beautiful place and opening it to avatars and humans (like the one who’s typing this entry). Your creation was a beautiful gift, and we will all miss it very much.

Style Cards:

The Amazing CatWoman in a Bathing Suit:
Body: 
Maitreya Lara
Head: Lelutka, Karin
Skin: 7 Deadly s{K}ins, Patience in Caramel, with NEW Lelutka Head Applier, available at the 7 Deadly s{K}ins Main store!
Bathing Suit: Faboo, Box Wrap Bikini (Maitreya Applier)
Hair: Elikatira, Piper (At Collabor88!)
Ears: Gauze, High Elf Ear

The Amazing CatWoman, all other photos:
Body: Maitreya Lara
Head: Lelutka, Karin
Skin: 7 Deadly s{K}ins, Patience in Caramel, with NEW Lelutka Head Applier, available at the 7 Deadly s{K}ins Main store!
Top: Emery, Audrina top, Smoke
Jeans: Emery, Lauren Riot Jeans, Grey
Shoes: Ingenue, Pandora Flats, Noir
Hair: Elikatira, Piper (At Collabor88!) (swept back style)
Hair: No Match, No Exceptions (straight style)
Ears: Gauze, High Elf Ear

Gwyneth, There Will Be Miracles:
Dress: 
Evie’s Closet, WindSong, Violet
Hair: 
Truth, Daniela
Hair Flowers: 
Liquence
Necklace: (L’Arc en Ciel) 
Evie’s Closet, Briar Rose
Shoes: 
Deviance, Milady’s Slipper, Amethyst
Skin: 
Curio, Simone, Moondrop
Ears: 
Lumae, Leevi Long Ears

Locations:

Bathing Suit Photos:
Linden Premium Wilderness

Surf Scene Photo:
It All Starts With A Smile

All Other Photos:
L’Arc en Ciel (Closing on the 28th of June)

Tagging Unicorns

The Amazing Catwoman:

The Amazing Catwoman:

You know how it goes. The Faire ends, so you’re out of work. You go back to Faerie for a couple of nights and decide you really can’t stand all the revelry, mostly because nobody ever pays any attention to you, so you put yourself back on the elf-for-hire network as “available”.

You find yourself a nice place to stay in a broken down little city.

You find yourself a nice place to stay in a broken down little city.

You find yourself a nice place to stay in a broken down little city. Luckily, the city contains (aside from Live Nudes, downstairs from where you’re staying) the only thing that makes cities worthwhile for you:

FRIED CHICKEN.

FRIED CHICKEN.

Fried chicken. It does not matter how many farms you visit, how many birds you kill in the field, there is nothing like greasy city fried chicken, and you have to go to the dingiest, ugliest, most regulation-wary (and packed!) one that you can find. This is where you will find me when I am in a city. Eating shitloads of fried chicken. After the cheap mobile phone shop, of course, and the quick Internet connection, and the brief note to the Fixer.

Fried chicken eating also requires exercise after, natch.

Fried chicken eating also requires exercise after, natch.

Fried chicken eating also requires exercise after, natch. Which is why I’m still licking my fingers, even as I’m trying to think of the right dance to do on a dock across the water from a church where they would not like my kind at all. 

But then the text comes, so you walk away.

But then the text comes, so you walk away.

But then the text comes, so you walk away.

We need you to come and tag unicorns at the Lost Unicorn Gallery, the text says. Don’t worry: we’ll provide the appropriate clothing and a spotlighter. Everybody knows you have to tag unicorns at night, right? I actually didn’t, but I made my way to the venue, anyway.

Why they always pick me for art gallery shit and foofy parties and fiction readings and lectures, I will never understand. Someone once said it was because I don’t look threatening, but it’s not like I can add a foot to my height and grow a lumberjack beard. Well, OK, I could, but I’d rather not just to get work.

Anyway, the Lost Unicorn Gallery is this posh-but-comfy art gallery that hosts some really good shows. They’re between big exhibitions now, and we’re heading in to high summer, which is the best time to catch unicorns in their natural habitat. According to the dwarf who was coordinating the tagging, the Gallery does this every year, just to make sure they know what the actual unicorn population is on the grounds. Because, well— I guess they’d hate to Lose one! See what I did there? Oh, I crack myself up.

And you’re going to crack up when you see the getup they put me in for this gig.

They dressed me up like a fantasy novel cover, and they grabbed the one tame unicorn on the grounds so I could practice tagging.

They dressed me up like a fantasy novel cover, and they grabbed the one tame unicorn on the grounds so I could practice tagging.

They dressed me up like a fantasy novel cover, and they grabbed the one tame unicorn on the grounds so I could practice tagging.

“Why this outfit?” I asked.

The dwarf smirked. “Oh, you know. The unicorns. They have to be able to….” and everybody started laughing.

“Have to be able to what?” I asked. The guy with the spotlight backed up a few paces.

“They have to be able to smell you,” he said. There was more laughter.

….oh. So that’s why I got this job.

“Fine,” I said, in a voice I thought should stifle further conversation on the matter.

“Fine,” I said, in a voice I thought should stifle further conversation on the matter (it did). “What do I do next?”

“Turn around so he can see your face and get your scent properly,” said the dwarf.

“Turn around so he can see your face and get your scent properly,” said the dwarf.

“Then, gently reach out to touch, and the tag should apply magically.”

“Then, gently reach out to touch, and the tag should apply magically.” It did.

It did, and a funny thing happened. I felt connected with the unicorn somehow, and I can tell you right now, unicorns do not like being thought of as “beasts”. I got quite a head-full about that one.

Fine, fine, we move on. This operation took the whole night.

I met a lot of unicorns.

I met a lot of unicorns.

I met a lot of unicorns, including this mother-and-daughter pair.

The kid unicorn kept asking about the metal in my concealed pocket.

The kid unicorn kept asking about the metal in my concealed pocket.

The kid unicorn kept asking about the metal in my concealed pocket. I got tired of trying to explain what a mobile phone was to him and tossed the phone to the spotlighter. Kid unicorn forgot about the mobile phone instantly and let me tag him with a touch.

I had to wade waist-deep in the river to get to know this unicorn.

I had to wade waist-deep in the river to get to know this unicorn.

I had to wade waist-deep in the river to get to know this unicorn. And let me tell you, unicorns do  have names. But you will never figure out how to pronounce them, and they slip out of your mind like my mobile phone slipped out of unicorn kid’s, earlier.

I was so excited when I found a winged horse!

I was so excited when I found a winged horse!

I was so excited when I found a winged horse! “What do I do with this one?” I asked the spotlighter.

“Just move on,” he said. “They’re quite common; not a concern for the gallery.”

Well, I’d never seen one before.

“Just let me know when he’s finished being an arse,” I said.

By this time, I was getting tired. Unicorn after unicorn, connection after connection, and then we come across this cocky little shit. “Just let me know when he’s finished being an arse,” I said. It took almost a quarter of an hour to get him to calm down and smell me and realise it was, yeah.

Fine, you smug fucks, it’s fine for a unicorn to touch me. I am touchable by unicorns. Is that what you wanted to know?

This unicorn had dozens of previous magical tags.

This unicorn had dozens of previous magical tags.

This unicorn had dozens of previous magical tags. When I asked about that, the spotlighter (the dwarf had gone home to his nice little house with his nice little family by this point) told me to brush them aside but leave them. They estimate this unicorn is the oldest one on the grounds. He wasn’t unkind, but he was more hesitant about connecting with me than some of the others.

My guess was he'd seen a lot more than he wanted to share with me.

My guess was he’d seen a lot more than he wanted to share with me.

My guess was he’d seen a lot more than he wanted to share with me. I walked away without even hearing his name, but he whispered something to me as I walked away. “Don’t forget me,” he said.

I turned back around. “How could I forget you?” I asked.

“Oh, many have. But I will leave you with the same gift I leave all of them, before they go. Here is one thing you must never forget, even if you forget me. My gift to you. Love,” he said, “is a well that does not run dry. Don’t forget.”

I didn’t understand that, but I promised not to forget.

From the oldest to the youngest, we came full circle.

From the oldest to the youngest, we came full circle.

From the oldest to the youngest, we came full circle. I thought the lights must mean it was almost dawn, but the spotlighter explained the lights in the Lost Unicorn Gallery’s grounds just do that.

“Hi, little guy,” I said. This one was only too happy to get to know me. I don’t know that he’d ever met someone he could touch before.

“You met grandfather!” he said as we had a quick nuzzle before I tagged him.

“I did, yes!” I couldn’t help being charmed by the little guy.

“Did he tell you something about love?” asked the unicorn foal.

“He did,” I replied.

“Good. You should always remember that,” replied the foal.

Great. Baby unicorns are giving me advice about love.

If he weren’t so cute, I think I probably would have hurled on the spot.

Love (love, love) Love is a well (love, love) Love is a well That does not run dry

Love (love, love)
Love is a well (love, love)
Love is a well
That does not run dry

The little guy was the last unicorn of the night. We were all exhausted by this time, and we hadn’t made it through even a third of what they suspect the population is. So I guess I’ve got a job for a few more nights, and a song running through my head as well.*

Style Card:
Skin: 7 Deadly s{K}ins: VALERIA (available NOW at the Paradise of Fantasy Fair!)
Armour: The Forge: Arcana Armour (Available at We Love Role-play!)
Clothing: OrsiniRed: Let Your Guard Down, Cobalt
Hair (city shots): Analog Dog: Petula
Hair (tagging unicorns): Truth: Rogue
Ring: Aisling: The Good Wife
Piercings: Ellabella
Ears: Mandala: Long Mandala Fantasy Elf Ears

Locations:
City: L’Arc-en-Ciel
Tagging Unicorns: Lost Unicorn Gallery

Spiffy photos taken with the indispensible aid of my LumiPro. Go look at the web page. Yes, I know they’re expensive. If you want to take amazing photos in SL, they’re worth every Linden.

*Some of you who know me know that in real life, I sometimes write songs. I wrote a song with the refrain noted above today.

Did I mention all I do is work?

The Amazing Catwoman:

The Amazing Catwoman:

Did I mention all I do is work? This morning, they assigned me to guard some literary talk over in BookLand… I mean, Sylvan of Spells. It’s pretty and all, but I’m not into books, and it always seems to be night there. Thought writers liked a lot of light, but hey, who am I to decide these things?

They armoured us all up, because today is the last day of the Faire.

They armoured us all up, because today is the last day of the Faire.

They armoured us all up, because today is the last day of the Faire. Apparently, when I’m on duty I have to carry a staff of some description—captain keeps a load of them at the back. I grabbed this one because there was a bird on it, but then all the other guards teased me because it had pink flowers, the fuckers.

Anyway, imagine my surprise when…. absolutely nothing happened. This chick showed up to give some talk about myths and legends or some shit like that, and nobody threatened to kill her. Put it on a broadsheet and sing it in the streets.

Here's the chick who showed up.

Here’s the chick who showed up.

Here’s the chick who showed up. She’s called Saffia Widdershins, and people were lining up to hear her speak, so I guess she must be somebody important.

But not, apparently, important enough to kill.

But not, apparently, important enough to kill.

But not, apparently, important enough for anybody to want to kill her, or even throw tomatoes. The audience seemed really impressed, anyway; she gave them all a book called The Book of the Champions, the same book I had to pore through when I was working on saving that Princess What’s Her Name. I totally forgot her name. Oh, well: if she’s like most Princesses, she’ll need saving again.

After that, they sent me, I kid you not, to a treehouse.

After that, they sent me, I kid you not, to a treehouse.

After that, they sent me, I kid you not, to a treehouse. There wasn’t anybody in the treehouse: I was just meant to stand on the bridge and watch for brigands.

This is like a song with a bad chorus. Imagine my surprise when …. absolutely nothing happened. This Faire is so safe they don’t even need guards! But the captain says at least I can keep the armour and the staff. The staff, well. It’ll probably go on a wall somewhere, once I have my own walls. The armour and belt though are topnotch stuff. They’re made by The Forge, and I really love The Forge. Because although you can get stuff there that makes you look like a camp follower, The Forge also makes armour that makes sense and covers up all your bits and doesn’t make you look like you’re going to kill the next dragon you see with your amazing boobage. How relieved I was when they put me in this stuff and not in some skimpy costume.

But seriously? Boring.

But seriously? Boring.

But seriously? Boring. Most boring guarding gig I’ve ever had: Everybody at this Faire is nice, and I don’t know where they got the idea there might be thieves about: I didn’t spot a single one, and I am good at looking for the thieves.

I’m kind of glad the Fantasy Faire is coming to an end, though it just means I’ll end up getting carted back to the Great Seelie Forest with her, where I’ll probably get blind drunk on faerie mead and chase squirrels or some shit until I get bored and go out looking for adventure again.

Oh! And I dyed my fucking hair. I am a Red Fae Avenger.

Style Card:
Armour, clothes, boots: The Forge: Daerwen (Available at Fantasy Faire!)
Belt: The Forge: Arwen’s Belt (Available at Fantasy Faire!)
Head: Lelutka
Ears: Gauze: High Elf Ears
Body: Maitreya
Skin: Glam Affair
Hair: No Match: No Flowers
Staff: Tia: Empress Staff (Ultrarare from a past Fantasy Gacha Carnival)
Necklace: Empyrean Forge: Ymir’s Sigil (Available at Fantasy Faire!)

Saffia Widdershine graciously allowed me to use her photograph here. The talk The Amazing Catwoman was watching over was the last-day discussion of the mythology incorporated into this year’s Fantasy Faire Hunt: The Lost Land. If you have not done the hunt yet, the sims will be up til Wednesday, I’m told, and no hunt stuff is being taken down, so go do it! This year’s hunt is a lot of fun, and of course the hunt prizes at the end are legion and amazing.

Spiffy photos taken with the indispensible aid of my LumiPro. Go look at the web page. Yes, I know they’re expensive. If you want to take amazing photos in SL, they’re worth every Linden.

Duty, duty, duty. That’s my lot.

The Amazing Catwoman:

The Amazing Catwoman:

Can I just mention, that while she goes round shopping up a storm and getting her face painted up like a fricking unicorn? That I had to save a princes who really didn’t need saving and wander around the whole of the Fairelands, trying to figure out what was up with her and her Champions, who would not know how to find their heads if they weren’t attached? And then? After that? My Guard Captain assigned me to guard the fine and frivolous folks of Ichi-go Ichi-e, where troubles apparently melt like sweet, pink lemon drops. Oh! I was less than amused!

Don't get me wrong: everything at the Faire is beautiful. Even when you see it from a distance and note how different all the realms are.

Don’t get me wrong: everything at the Faire is beautiful. Even when you see it from a distance and note how different all the realms are.

Don’t get me wrong: everything at the Faire is beautiful. Even when you see it from a distance and note how different all the realms are.

And She just eats it up, the Queen. Oh, there I am, watching after the people of the Fairelands, and there she goes, spending gold and attending dance parties with Important People and — I swear, not an hour ago, I saw her dancing with a member of Fairelands Law Enforcement. In my pigtails.

But seriously. Put me in Tangleshimer. Put me in Sylvan of Spells.

Hell, put me back on book-tending duty in Poppetsborough: at least those poor people have a real crisis going on!

Hell, put me back on book-tending duty in Poppetsborough: at least those poor creatures have a real crisis going on!

Hell, put me back on book-tending duty in Poppetsborough: at least those poor creatures have a real crisis going on!

But do not, I repeat: DO NOT put me back in this place where little pink fairies try to serve me tea, and there is a FRIENDLY WEASEL under my table! People! Weasels are not friendly!

But do not, I repeat: DO NOT put me back in this place where little pink fairies try to serve me tea, and there is a FRIENDLY WEASEL under my table! People! Weasels are not friendly!

And worst of all, don’t make me turn around and see the glorious temples of the Odyssey Realm, where I might get assigned if I’m lucky and half the guard force falls ill. Will you just look at that in the distance. Have you ever seen buildings so beautiful?

I am so, so, so not best pleased to be here.

I am so, so, so not best pleased to be here.

I am so, so, so not best pleased to be assigned here tonight. “Oh, but the poor little pink glow fairies and peaceful meditation denizens, they need your help, TAC!” I roll my eyes at these people. Go have some fun. Go knock over a kebab stand. Go, I don’t know. Stop listening to Loreena McKennitt. And put on something black, for God’s sake.

Regrettably necessary disclaimer: I actually really love Ichi-go Ichi-e. I think it is one of the most beautiful sim designs I’ve ever seen. I just loved to have The Amazing Catwoman rant about being assigned there as well. And it gave me a chance to show off some of the amazing Fairelands scenery in my own humble way.

Style Card:
Hair: No Match: No Exception
Body: Maitreya
Head: Lelutka
Skin: Glam Affair
Face Piercings: Ellabella
Ears: Gauze High Elf Ear
Necklace: Empyrean Forge: The Dreamer: Fortuity
Ring: Aisling: The Good Wife
Clothes: TFF: Elf Huntress in Green (Available at the Fantasy Faire!)
Boots: Paper Moon, Huck Boots (Available at the Fantasy Faire!)

Spiffy photos of TAC taken with the indispensible aid of a LumiPro. Go look at the web page. Yes, I know they’re expensive. If you want to take amazing photos in SL, they’re worth every Linden.

The Journey of a Morning

The Amazing Catwoman:

The Amazing Catwoman:

I can always tell when the Fantasy Faire is coming. There’s something in the air that lets me know. Something pricks in my unusually large ears and lets me know there’s work to be done, places to go, a cause to support, and lives to save.

Probably that sounds dramatic.

Probably that sounds dramatic.

Probably that sounds dramatic. But when I woke up this morning, I was in Faerie, and Faerie always makes me feel a little more dramatic. I don’t know how that  alterego of mine does it, but I guess being a Fae Queen is all right for some. Travelling to the Faire is the journey of a morning, for a wily fae anyway. But of course, it’s also the journey of a lifetime.

In some ways, the Faire is a headache for someone like me.

In some ways, the Faire is a headache for someone like me.

In some ways, the Faire is a headache for someone like me. It’s a headache of love, but it’s a headache. Because I’m walking around making sure all the merchants in my section have paid their tithes, and some of them are downright cranky. I guess they’re the artisans, so they get to choose how they are, but really: it can make a girl a little crazy.

I am The Amazing Catwoman. Some of you might have seen me before: I get to go to exciting places and show off the beauty that’s here all through the realms I walk, and I don’t have to be beautiful myself to do it, which she has to be, all the time. I guess some of you will decide that she has some kind of a split personality and I am only part of her, but I’ll take you a little farther and explain who I am.

I am her player, her puppeteer.

I am her player, her puppeteer.

I’m her player, her puppeteer, and I’m going to be very frank with you. Over the course of the Fantasy Faire, I’m going to be telling you why you should go there and spend lots of money. I’m also going to be showcasing great stuff that Gwyneth wouldn’t wear, or that doesn’t work with her personality. Most of the time I’m going to do this in character, but before you think the person pushing the keys here is just a nutter, I figured I’d tell you who she is and why she’s doing this.

Gwen, the player, is a role-player, writer, musician, dilettante, SL photographer and blogger—and her husband is going to die because he has cancer.

We live in an amazing age, full of technology and wonder, but cancer tears lives apart, and it’s tearing Gwen’s life apart right now. Last year, when she visited the Faire as a punter and got a sense of the scope of what they do here, she knew she had to get involved. Because Gwen can’t cure cancer. But if everybody works together, supports organisations like The American Cancer Society, we all can. And Gwen believes in miracles, believes that maybe if she helps out at the Faire something magical will happen and the next doctor’s appointment will be the one where they say, “We’ve got this new experimental treatment we want you to try…” and it’ll be the one that works. And Gwen’s husband won’t die, and she won’t be a widow at the reasonably young real life age of 49.

There; I’ve told you who I am outside of all this. Over the course of the Faire, I might tell you more.

Channelling Water in Yozakura

Channelling Water in Yozakura

Channeling water in Yozakura, The Amazing Catwoman is wearing her new leathers. This is the Alchemist ensemble from Gauze, without the pauldrons (I’ll show you the pauldrons later!) or the belt (ditto!). I love outfits that can be worn in a number of permutations, and Gauze did such a good job on this one: the detailing is exquisite, and the more she wears these, the more she likes them.

But it's time to get to work now.

But it’s time to get to work now.

It’s time to get to work now, but first I go to my favourite hair store in all the world, Analog Dog, to see if they have something new for Faire that I will like. And they do! The long pigtails are whimsical enough that I can feel like I’m at Faire, yet they keep my hair out of my face so I can be a good watcher.

Today I am watching over Wildehaven Marsh.

Today I am watching over Wildehaven Marsh.

Today I am watching over Wildehaven Marsh, so with magical staff (also part of the Gauze ensemble) in hand and pauldrons and belt put on, I make my way to the pier and keep an eye on the town gate to the harbour: shoplifters, when they are active in the Marsh, often try to escape through the gate and get away via boat. And we cannot, cannot allow that, because all the shoppers must pay their tithe and help us wipe out cancer here at the Faire.

And so I watch, diligently and carefully, and I talk to few people. In the distance, I can see her, going on her endless shopping trip with this or that friend from the Wylds. Right social butterfly she is. But then something makes me smirk. Because sometime in the last quarter hour of my watch, I see him, too: the Gypsy, Davey. With a raven-haired beauty on one side and a ginger tart on the other. Well, well, well. I know she doesn’t get jealous: we fae don’t have that kind of twisted morality where we think we own our lovers, thank the gods. But I’m not sure if either of them knows the other is here. Oh, oh, oh: this will be fun to watch.

And I am good at watching.

And I am good at watching.

And I am good at watching, even when it’s just clouds while taking a break from my duties.

Godspeed, Gypsy Davey. Let’s see if she knows you’re alive when there’s shopping to be done!

Style Cards:

Channelling Water in Yozakura:
Mesh Head: Lelutka
Skin: Glam Affair
Clothes: Gauze, The Alchemist (Available at the Fantasy Faire!)
Hair: Dura
Piercings: Ellabella

But it’s time to get to work now (and subsequent photos)
Hair: Analog Dog, Petula, Dark Browns (Available at the Fantasy Faire!)
Skin: La Petite Morte, Ellen
Clothes: Gauze, The Alchemist (Available at the Fantasy Faire!)
Piercings: Ellabella

Spiffy photos taken with the indispensible aid of my LumiPro. Go look at the web page. Yes, I know they’re expensive. If you want to take amazing photos in SL, they’re worth every Linden.

OOC: Why I Relay

This blog has been mostly a role playing blog, and now I’m expanding it because I’ve been selected as a Fantasy Faire blogger. That means some posts are now going to cover fantasy fashion (not that they didn’t before!), and I’ll be chronicling my experiences at the Fantasy Faire and expounding its wonders and attractions for all of you.

This post is different.

We’ve been asked to talk about why we are doing this, and so I have an important picture to share with you and a story about how cancer has affected me personally in my real life.

My beloved husband of only ten years was diagnosed with Hodgkins Lymphoma a little  more than two years ago. Although Hodgkins is meant to be one of the “easiest” cancers to deal with and has a high survival rate, his case hasn’t gone according to plan, and just a few weeks ago, we got the opinions of his doctors: they can do no more for him and are moving to palliative care. Most lymphoma patients in this situation are expected to live for about a year; however, in my husband’s case, the disease has seemed to move very fast, so doctors expect him to be on the short end of that measuring stick.

So. Although there are many good reasons to work tirelessly for cancer cure research, my personal story and my personal reason is all about the tremendous sorrow, stress, and rage I feel at the prospect of losing the centre of my life after ten wonderful years of marriage.

Why do I relay?

The Amazing Catwoman says it all: I’m too young to be a widow.

OOC: The Amazing Catwoman Gets A Makeover!

I know what you guys are thinking: "Aw, yeah! Finally some sexy photos!" Wrong!

I know what you guys are thinking: “Aw, yeah! Finally some sexy photos!” Wrong!

I know what you guys are thinking: “Aw, yeah! Finally some sexy photos!” Wrong!

I’m really just going to talk about mesh bodies and heads.

Look at those KNEES!

Look at those KNEES!

There was a lot of discussion around the Lelutka Mesh Head, which was released on the first of April, on the Skin Addiction group, which (after the Wylds OOC group and MOCK cosmetics, natch) is probably the most fun chat group I belong to on Second Life. Talk about people who know everything that’s going on! Anyway, over at A Passion for Virtual Fashion, Harper Beresford reviewed the Lelutka Mesh head before it was released, and she noted that with the head, you can change the face a little bit. Now, I’m madly in love with Gwyneth, but I had been planning to make The Amazing Catwoman over in advance of the SL Fantasy Faire, and so I brought home demos of all three heads, tried them on, and decided on “Aria”, mostly because it has smaller lips than the others, and I don’t tend to make av faces with big, pouty lips. I also picked up the Belleza Mesh Body to go with it, because I knew the Lelutka head was specifically designed with that body in mind.

And the JOINTS! OMG, the JOINTS!

And the JOINTS! OMG, the JOINTS!

I’d demoed the Maitreya body a couple of times and really liked it, but Gwyneth is already in the SLink, so I figured I should stick with what I had. And actually, though I love the SLink body, the Maitreya one is so easy to use, the alphas are more targeted, and I feel like more mesh clothing is going to fit than with the SLink one.

Did somebody say, "Hips"?

Did somebody say, “Hips”?

Now, to tell you the truth, The Amazing Catwoman started out as just a photo personality. Her shape was exactly the same as Gwyneth’s, except she had a very different skin, wore different clothes, and carried weapons from time to time. But she’s become much more than that: she’s sort of my adventurous, edgy alterego, I guess, whereas Gwyneth is really much more me in so many ways. But enough philosophising. I widened her hips, gave her a little more in the tit department, increased her leg and torso musculature, broadened her shoulders, and shortened her down to normal woman height rather than Gwyneth’s willowy Sidhe height.

Just say "yes" to curves!

Just say “yes” to curves!

Now, you’ll notice I put her in a very light, almost moon-pale, skin. I have always liked very, very pale skins, and Gwyneth is about as pale as it’s possible for a Seelie Sidhe to be. With TAC (The Amazing Catwoman), I figured I could go a little lighter than that. Glam Affair has done the basic skins for the Maitreya body and the Lelutka head, and they are gorgeous. Glam Affair has already released appliers for the Lelutka head in a variety of fun makeups, but there’s makeup in the Mesh Head’s HUD, so you don’t even need that. Even better, the basic skins are available in 10 tones from Glam Affair. If you’re wearing the Maitreya Body and the Lelutka Head, you will only ever have to buy skin appliers for the head: they should just match the skins on the body effortlessly. And they do!

Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 6 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 7 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 8 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 9 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 10 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 11 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 12 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 13 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 14 Maitreya Body & Lelutka Mesh Head Aria - 15

So without buying any skin appliers, you get ten beautiful skins with the head/body combination, in a full range of colours.

But what can you do with this head?

Lots of stuff!

Lots of stuff!

Lots of stuff! Her mouth opens, her eyes close, you can change the eyeshadow, lighten or darken lipstick…

facecollage2

Change eyelashes or tint them, remove them altogether. The last four pictures here are about playing with some of the Glam Affair appliers to give TAC a unique look. One of the things I worried about before getting a mesh head was whether my avatar would now look “the same as everybody else”. And there is a generic quality to the face that falls within the realm of what’s currently popular on SL, particularly the lips. So I thought about TAC. Who is she? Mostly, she’s a doll I dress up and take photos of, but who is she really? What’s her style? Let’s see. She has long, pointy ears with plenty of metal in them. What about facial piercings to carry that look over on to her face? She favours trousers over skirts and is often posed with a bow or other weapon. She might really be a complete badass. Which means she needs badass hair. Truth, as ever, delivered! I put her in Rogue, coloured it half purple, and voila! Instant badass!

Instant badass!

Instant badass!

I also shopped around for AOs and ended up with TUTY’s “Dangerous Girl”, which is a lot less sexed-up than your average girl AO.

So that’s my story of how you can take a mesh head and make it your own.

So, meet the New! Amazing Catwoman!

So, meet the New! Amazing Catwoman!

So, meet the New! Amazing Catwoman! She and Gwyneth will be ready to take on Fantasy Faire at the end of April, and I’m looking forward to all the stories they’re going to live, and the stories they’re going to hear and tell, as well. I hope some of you will come along for the ride.

Head: Lelutka
Body: Maitreya
Skin: Glam Affair
Ears: Gauze
Piercings: Ellabella
Necklace: The Forge
Boots: Just Design
Tunic: Mirage
Leggings: ABC (applier)

OOC: A Surprise Gift!

You know that feeling, when you come through a mystical portal, and you haven't got your bearings yet, and you have no idea what sort of a world you've landed in?

You know that feeling, when you come through a mystical portal, and you haven’t got your bearings yet, and you have no idea what sort of a world you’ve landed in?

You know that feeling, when you come through a mystical portal, and you haven’t got your bearings yet, and you might lose the light soon, and you have no idea what sort of a world you’ve landed in? The Amazing Catwoman knows that feeling!

And so do I. See, I never win anything. But sometime last week, I got a surprise IM from Bee Dumpling, whom some of you might recognise as the creative force behind The White Armory. She told me I’d been chosen to win a fatpack of clothing from TWA! I was gobsmacked, and really pleased, and of course I immediately checked out and tried out all the stuff.

TAC @ Studio Skye_027

Now, The White Armory is known for making gorgeous dresses, so I figured Gwyneth should be the model. But no! Bee had sent me the Goddess Andraste Dress Pack, and you know how The Amazing Catwoman loves her leather, so I immediately switched avatars and went searching for just the right place to take some photos.

Now, The White Armory is known for making gorgeous dresses, so I figured Gwyneth would be the model. But no! Bee had sent me the Goddess Andraste Dress Pack, and you know how The Amazing Catwoman loves her leather, so I immediately switched avatars and went searching for just the right place to take some photos.

Not surprisingly, it was one of Studio Skye’s brilliant sims, Neist Point. I love visiting this sim, because everything on it is drop dead gorgeous and it looks great in any (wind)light.

I really love the detailing on this outfit: the straps fit realistically, and the sizing fits perfectly with standard mesh sizing guidelines, which means I don't have to adjust The Amazing Catwoman's shape to make her look like she has humongous melons in order to fit into it!

I imagine The Amazing Catwoman realises she’s here to help defend the Castle Of Goodness from the Bad Evil Murderous Orcs. Or something like that. And nothing ticks off an Evil Murderous Orc like a big, fat mace in the face!

I really love the detailing on this outfit: the straps fit realistically, and the sizing is perfectly aligned to mesh standard sizing guidelines, which means I don’t have to adjust The Amazing Catwoman’s shape to make her look like she has humongous melons in order to fit into it!

I imagine The Amazing Catwoman realises she’s here to help defend the Castle Of Goodness from the Bad Evil Murderous Orcs. Or something like that. And nothing ticks off an Evil Murderous Orc like a big, fat mace in the face!

Don't even think about attacking this castle, you Evil Murderous Orcs!

Don’t even think about attacking this castle, you Evil Murderous Orcs!

Don’t even think about attacking this castle, you Evil Murderous Orcs!

I’m really loving this outfit, and I’m sure The Amazing Catwoman will have plenty of Brilliant Adventures while wearing it. Thank you, Bee and The White Armory!

Clothes: The White Armory, Goddess Andraste Dress in Moss
Hair: Olive, The Daisy Hair (Arcade Gacha)
Ears: Gauze
Jewellery: Aisling (Ring: The Good Wife [Enchantment]; Necklace and Bracers: Gaia Gacha)
Boots: Shadenfreude, Amargosa
Skin: La Petite Morte, Ellen (tone 3)
Makeup: MOCK (of course!)
Poses: from both Black Tulip and RACK
Weapons and Shield: RACK (Shieldwoman pose set, Fantasy Gacha Carnival 8/2014)