ERROR: Out Of Cheese

Our first weekend away in I don’t know how long. Oh, it was going to be glorious! Clutie had gone ahead of us to the little cabin by the river and stocked the fridge, but other than that, we’d have no contact with Faerie unless there was an emergency of epic proportion. That was the plan.

Nathaniel was stuck in some meeting with some Mysthaven people, or something. I don’t know. That bunch can’t seem to buckle their own trousers without his assistance, not that I’m one to talk.

Everything looked beautiful!

Everything looked beautiful! I couldn’t get over what a lovely kitchen someone had painstakingly and perfectly put into this house. The views out the windows were of frost-coloured trees, and on the rear side, the boat dock and the ice-cold but clear river water. Clutie had left out bread for sandwiches, bread with butter, and a little bit of cheese with some crackers. Which is a good thing, because of course Nathaniel is originally Victorian. And I’m sure I don’t have to tell you this, but Victorians love cheese. Cheese for starters, cheese on the main, cheese for afters; forget dessert, bring on the cheese board.

And then.

And then I looked in the refrigerator.

Oh, my gods! The horror!

Oh, my gods! The horror! There was no cheese. That’s right. No cheese in the fridge. Well. I did the only sane thing. I broke down in tears.

Nathaniel, because his timing is perfect, chose this moment to arrive.

Nathaniel, because his timing is perfect, chose this moment to arrive. “Gwyn? Honey?”

“There’s no cheese!” I was practically hysterical by this point.

“Gwyn, there’s some cheese right here.” I heard the sound of Nathaniel picking up the cheese knife. “And it’s not bad either, nice and nutty, little bland. Don’t know what these weird salty crackers are for: you don’t want something that salty with cheese. Cheese is already salty enough.”

“You don’t understand! That was it! That was all the cheese!”

“You don’t understand! That was it! That was all the cheese!” I could feel myself starting to hyperventilate.

“That was all of it?” I could tell he still had some in his mouth. Fucking enhanced fae senses meant I could hear him swallow, too.

“I don’t see that this is the end of the world,” he said.

“I don’t see that this is the end of the world,” he said. “We do have a mirror. They can summon us; we can summon them. Just tell Clutie to bring some more cheese. And tell her to get something with a little more age on it this time.” He sniffed critically. “And some soda bread.”

I hiccupped. “You mean you’re not angry?” I turned to face him.

He sighed. “No, Gwyneth. I’m not angry. Do you think that running Mysthaven will turn me into Maric? I’m unlikely to have his level of temper about anything, particularly not something like cheese.”

“But…But Victorians! They love cheese!”

Nathaniel cleared his throat. “A lot of people love cheese.” He walked toward me and put his arms around me. “Just calm down, love.”

Luckily for everyone involved, Nathaniel knows the best way to calm me down.

He even rubbed noses with me.

He even rubbed noses with me. I used to think that was so adorable when we first kissed. Well, after the first disastrous kiss, of course. That one doesn’t bear thinking about.

“So… everything’s going to be all right?”

“So, everything’s going to be all right?”

“Yes, Gwyneth, everything is going to be all right. I’ll send out a ping for Clutie or Bran to pick up some more cheese, and then we will be all set to enjoy our…” finally, he looked up to see that the bed was up a ladder-like flight of steps and on a platform suspended by chains from the ceiling. “Hey, any chance we could get them to bring, I don’t know, a cot or some blankets or something, so we could sleep down here near the fire? So much more romantic.”

I smirked against his chest. “We’re not going to break the house, sweetheart.”

“You never know,” he replied. “You just never know.”

Style Cards:
First of all, this whole post was inspired by the delightful and beautiful kitchen Death Row Designs have created for Shiny Shabby. It’s called the Rustic Kitchen, and it comes in both Adult and PG versions. You can buy it in pieces or as a full set. The pose where Gwyneth is crying at the refrigerator really is called No Cheese. I must have gone through five houses trying to find one where it would fit perfectly, and I came upon the Fisher Point Cottage from Trompe Loeil. It had just the right mixture of class and rustic charm, and the wood textures of the kitchen fit really well with its walls. The only complaint I have is there’s not quite enough wall space to display the extra shelves and spice rack that also come with this beautiful kitchen. Remember, the Death Row Designs Rustic Kitchen is available NOW at Shiny Shabby.

Gwyneth:
Body: Maitreya
Head: Catwa, Catya Bento Mesh Head
Hair: Emo-Tions, Anik (Available NOW at Hairology!)
Eyes: Mesange, First Date Eyes (Omega eye appliers)
Skin: Lumae, Ruby in T1 (Available NOW at The Lumae Main Store!)
Ears: Swallow, Shiny Ears (Available NOW at Shiny Shabby!)
Hands: Vista, Bento Prohands
Jacket: E-Clipse Design, Nemo Coat, Brown
Jeans: Petite Mort, Rawwashed Distressed Skinny Jeans
Shoes: The Plastik, Filivina Heels (Available NOW at Shiny Shabby!) (Note that these shoes are unrigged and you will have to adjust them to your feet, no matter what version of the shoe you are wearing.)