Three Twisted Knots

We were on our way home from the Faire. I’d used so much energy that we had to make some of the travel by foot as Bran had flounced off in a huff after he’d looked at how much I’d spent. He’d probably have refused to help me if he’d known. But along the way home, travelling through realm after realm, we found a sign for another Faire! This one was modelled after a little mediaeval village and it purported to be for Role-Players. Now, I used to do a lot of roleplaying before everything changed, so of course we had to go and check it out. I found the perfect gift for Nathaniel—a full size, working Orrery! I presented it to him when I returned, and he had a marvellous time putting the whole thing together….

But then, he had to teach himself how to use it! Luckily, it came with a monstrous tome that explained the whole thing in archaic English. Of course, technical doublespeak in archaic English is like sweets with a side of dessert for My Consort, so he figured out the basics quickly. Then, we decided (well, it was my bright idea) to set the Orrery to predict where the stars and planets will be at the expected time for the children to leave the crystals on the tree and come into the world of Faerie for all of us to love and cherish and other bullshit I just can’t bring myself to say, because it’s one thing to be a Fae Queen. But to be a mother? I hope Aoibheann comes back to us soon: I need her!

So it was my bright idea to determine what we could from the children’s stars, and… yeah. I shouldn’t have done that.

Because it’s not good. Their future paths are full of shadow and drama and fear and scary things.

“So,” I said, and I raised a hand to the skies, “Stars! Stars, realign for me!”

Nathaniel leaned back on the heel of one foot, folded his arms across his chest, and shook his head. “The stars aren’t going to realign for you, Gwyn,” he said. And he wasn’t very kind about it either.

I am the Faerie Queen. The flowers grow at my touch. Birds fucking burst into song when I walk by. If I smile, people kiss other people, even the ones they already know. My words can move the hearts of gods and men! And besides, the Summer is rising in me, rising. Who could deny me? Who would dare? I explained all this to Nathaniel, as patiently as I could with my hands imploring the stars to move. Which is to say I was not patient at all. 

Nathaniel, my love, my Consort, and more I cannot tell you now, stood implacably, hands still folded, and explained to me that gods and men were one thing but the cosmos itself was another. Apparently, the Seelie Queen does not have that phenomenal level of cosmic powers.

Well, that’s just great. I can make the flowers grow and make things happy and make everybody want to fucking sing Kumbayah, but I cannot convince the stars to make just a little detour to save the futures of my future children?

I said very bad words to Nathaniel, and I stalked back home, to the treehouse, told Bran to fuck off (after he got me some tea, natch!), and sat down to pore over dusty fucking books. And I pulled my hair down as well, because you can’t effectively rave like a madwoman in a neat bun. Seriously, if I’d an ounce of energy left after all that travelling (and the shopping, oh my goddess, the shopping!) I’d just done, I would have realm-walked to some American university in the 21st century, sweet-talked my way past library security (those people love an English accent!), and just Googled it. But as it was, I was stuck with the books.

I did maths. By hand. In the growing darkness. What a thrill for the Fae Queen on a Friday night.

And of course the Orrery’s calculations were right. Of course they were. My children were doomed. Now, many Fae Queens, they find out their children are doomed, they go off on some kind of screaming, Ophelia-level tangent. Not me. I am a child of my upbringing, and I understand distractions. So, since I now knew Maths (ha!), I went back and plotted my own stars, as well.

And you know what I found out? Even though our birthdates are months and (ok) years apart, I had the same foul predictors at my birth. And look where I ended up!

The fault, dear Gwyneth, is not in our stars, but in ourselves. How lovely to be Shakespeare literate in Faeryland. (Actually, it’s quite common.)

I apologised to Bran, who didn’t need an apology and loves me still, and then I climbed down out of the tree and into the Great Seelie Forest.

I found myself eventually, as often happens, in the pond. Water is my element of course, and the urge to just create a hailstorm the likes of which Faerie has never seen and pelt the world into nonexistence subsided a bit once I was there, in the darkening twilight, with my feet in the water. And I thought about stars, and selves.

Fine. Shit stars may not mean a shit life, as obviously my experience has proved. Because who wouldn’t want to have their whole world ripped out from under them, discover all the stuff they dreamed of was real, and then end up having to fucking manage it all in the closest thing Fair Elfland has to the Back Forty?

Fine. I am Queen of all I survey, but I may not survey the stars. I had Kern write a note to Nathaniel (yes, Kern has recovered from his encounter with Dyisi, but I think he is a bit satyr-struck as he keeps mumbling things in iambic pentameter about her eyes, her mystical eyes—if we were on the Internet here I’d type *eyeroll* and just Vaguetweet it). As it is, I may hop realms sometime later in the week and post it to my new “blog”, just for fun. But anyway. Had Kern write an apology to Nathaniel because I couldn’t bear to write it myself. He’ll forgive me, I’m sure of it.

It’s so weird to contemplate having children. I have recently softened my opinion of Maric (and by ‘softened’ I mean bom-chika), but he is not my children’s father. I long to see My Lord Janus again, and I am so afraid to tell Maric, or Nathaniel, or anyone, that Janus came to see me the night we returned from Faire. So afraid.

So now here I sit, scribbling at my desk in the library. In the middle of the night. It’s like being back in the PhD programme at Anglia Ruskin and knowing that FM, Thesis Goddess Of Doom, will shortly be explaining to me that I’m better than this and I must just work harder.

Great. Time, I think, to hide inside something (or maybe even someone!) else. And why isn’t there a constant stream of kitten pictures somewhere in Faerie? There ought to be kitten pictures.

Style Cards:

Orrery Pictures:

Orrery: Ex Machina: Copernicus Grand Orrery (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)

Nathaniel:
Clothes: Les Encantades: Finrod in Azure (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Pendant: Empyrean Forge: Chronos Timepiece (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Hair: Wasabi Pills: Orion, Cinnamon
Skin: DNA—Damien Type 1
Eyes: Mad Designs Eyes: Promise, Green

Gwyneth:
Gown: Krystal: Lady Mae in Sapphire (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Shoes: Eclectica: Crushed Velvet Pumps
Pendant: Otherskin: Jormungand Necklace (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Earrings: Otherskin: Jormungand Necklace (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Skin: DeeTaleZ: Eva Blond in Nordic (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Ears: Lumae: Leevi Long Ears
Hair: Exile: London

Roses: The Looking Glass: Hearts Like China Roses (A memory of FF 2015, from their mainstore)
Ground Cover: The Looking Glass: Ichi Fields (A memory of FF 2015, from their mainstore)
Stone Circle:  GOR CON: Menhircircle (an ultra rare from the Age of Vikings event, yonks ago)

All Other Pictures (Gwyneth alone):
Hair: Analog Dog, Beckon (NEW from Analog Dog!)
Crown: Fawny: Sweet Rose Wreath(available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Bracelets: Fawny: Sweet Rose Bracelets (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Clothes: Storybook: Gaea in Spring (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Pendant: Otherskin: Jormungand Necklace (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Earrings: Otherskin: Jormungand Necklace (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Skin: DeeTaleZ: Eva Blond in Nordic (available at the We Love Role-Play May Event!)
Ears: Lumae: Leevi Long Ears

Roses: The Looking Glass: Hearts Like China Roses (A memory of FF 2015, from their mainstore)
Gazebo: The Looking Glass: Enchanted Gazebo
Trumpet Mushroom: Cerridwen’s Cauldron

Spiffy photos taken with the indispensible aid of my LumiPro. Go look at the web page. Yes, I know they’re expensive. If you want to take amazing photos in SL, they’re worth every Linden.

Regular readers (all 5 of you!): The first photograph of Nathaniel and Gwyneth with the Orrery is my entry into the We Love Role-Play Second Anniversary Photo Contest. Pop round the contest Flickr group and check out the other entries: there are some beautiful pictures there! Who knows? You might be inspired yourself. If you are, the rules are there in the group, and you have until 25 May to get your entry in.