The Hazards of Contemporary Life, According to The Amazing Catwoman

First of all, they always put you up in a place with a name that only sounds good. “423 Windsor Terrace, LakeView, Limenós” sounds pretty posh, doesn’t it?

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Yeah. Only the view was posh.

Yeah. Only the view was posh.

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The rest was Neo-Modern Flophouse, but I was only there for one night, so.

The rest was Neo-Modern Flophouse, but I was only there for one night. At least there were no bugs in the bed, and it’s not like it was dirty. Everything was reasonable, just not as nice as the view. Well, the armchair was pretty good.

I was only there for a quick job, and then it was onto a train to a ferry port and out to Awenia, where I was still mostly hiding out in the big forest and keeping far away from her up in Faerie. One of those “What Could Possibly Go Wrong” moments could have happened right then, except I was too smart for it. Totes McGoats.

All I had to do was show up at the Limenós main train station, cast a spell on a couple of marks, and then slip down into the station to head for the Dragonstar, and then home, or as close as I get to it these days. Simples. I didn’t even have to work too hard on the glamour, though of course it’s still not OK to be Svart Alfar no matter what Stupid Event Or Other has convinced people it’s OK to be Elfy in public or whatever.

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Gotcha! Spell went off without a hitch.

Gotcha! Spell went off without a hitch; these two marks couldn’t see Elfin magic for whatever reason, and I didn’t stick around to find out what the premixed spell was actually going to do to them; that’s above my pay grade most of the time. I was just happy they were parked on a side street and about to engage in the time-honoured tradition of pre-trip snogging to notice a shady elf in leather lurking around behind them. I do like it when they give me these jobs within walking distance of the getaway train, though. Makes for better reading, less indigestion, you get the picture. With an hour to go before my train left, I had enough time to get a good seat, maybe even upgrade a class and put my feet up for the ten-hour trek to the ferry port.

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There is no escape.

And although I was sure I wasn’t followed down into the subway that led to the Dragonstar platform, there is at least one entity I can’t get away from, and that’s her. Ever since it became socially acceptable across multiple Realms to be supernatural, She has been getting work as a model for some perfume company, and this fucking “We’re All Mad Here” advert has been everywhere. You can’t open a fucking magazine or in this case walk down a set of fucking steps without being fucking bombarded.

Yeah. This was all I needed. I should be steeled to it by now, but I just can’t move beyond being angry with regard to that little situation where she kept me prisoner for half a year and then didn’t even bother to talk to me. And then her house got blown up and she had other things to worry about. Bleah. I was going to need chocolate on the train, and lots of it. Luckily, Limenós is famous for very good chocolate, and I knew just the place to get some of the hot, liquid variety before I boarded the train and probably some of the dark, melt-in-your mouth type as well.

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Of course, then things got a little more complicated.

Of course, then things got a little more complicated.

Great. Of all the entities to run into at the bottom of a subway, I have to meet quite possibly the most attractive dark unicorn I’ve ever seen.

Now, if you’ve ever played the The Amazing Catwoman Home Game, you know that I once had to dress up as a fantasy novel cover and tag unicorns at some stupid unicorn preserve. And let’s just say that not very much has changed in the last three years since I had to do that gig.

So that’s why the unicorn looked at me and said, in a voice that brushed soft like feathers against my mind, because they don’t usually speak out loud, “Well met, elf maiden. Why must you cover your beautiful skin?”

I sighed. “You’re not long off the preserve, are you?”

“Long enough to know that companions such as you are a rarity here,” he replied smoothly.

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I tried to find a way to blame this on her.

I tried to find a way to blame this on her. Clearly the advert had summoned the worst possible encounter possible for me.

“Look, I’m sure you’re very nice and all….”

“You couldn’t pronounce it,” he said.

“Do you think I don’t know that? I’m sure you’re very nice and all, but I’ve got a train to catch.”

“Are you on the Dragonstar? That’s my destination as well. These Limenóans aren’t very good at recognising magical needs though, are they? They keep trying to give me apples. I mean, apples are OK….”

“…but chocolate is better.” I couldn’t resist.

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“You are so right!”

“You are so right!” He brought himself up to his full height, which was considerably taller than me.

“I don’t suppose, if you’re heading for the Dragonstar as well, that you’d mind getting a friendly mythical beast a bit of the old bitter cacao?”

I rolled my eyes. “I could trouble myself, but I’m in rather a hurry.”

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He struck a gait.

He struck a gait. “Not to brag, but I’ve got a first class ticket and unicorns are always allowed a female travelling companion.” He snorted. “It’s meant to keep us calm.”

Suddenly this was all looking a bit more attractive. And besides, assuming someone did decide to come looking for me, who looks more innocent than an elfin maid (yes, fine!) accompanying a majestic unicorn? “Well, since you’ve appealed to my higher nature,” I said….

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And that’s how I found myself on the back of a dark unicorn.

And that’s how I found myself on the back of a dark unicorn, buying chocolate at the poshest chocolate shop in the Limenós Main Station (and that’s pretty posh), and getting a quarter car to myself in first class with stable space for a unicorn and a bed three times as comfortable as the one I slept in last night.

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I have no idea how long I’ll stay the travelling companion of a dark unicorn.

I have no idea how long I’ll stay the travelling companion of a dark unicorn, but things will rarely be dull. And who knows? It could be the start of a beautiful relationship. I can’t believe I actually just said that.

Sometimes, while my life is never exactly straightforward, it does not suck to be me.

Style Card:
Body: Maitreya
Head: LAQ, Lulu Bento Mesh Head
Hair: Argrace, Kazuha
Eyes: Anatomy, Meow Eyes
Ears: Gauze, High Elf Ears
Skin: 7 Deadly s{K}ins, Story, Walnut (Available NOW at Designer Showcase!)
Tunic: Senzafine, Meilikki (Available NOW at We ❤ Role-play!)
Boots: Senzafine, Telcontar Boots
Bracers: Lakrya, Yasha Mesh Bracers (Available NOW at We ❤ Role-play!)
Necklace: Bliensen & Maitai, Celtic Collar (Available NOW at We ❤ Role-play!)

Unicorn: Water Horse, Riding Unicorn
Unicorn Skin: Wren Works, Black Opal
Unicorn Mane and Tail: Flying Horse Head Studios, Glitterati
Unicorn Hooves: Cinnamon, Elven Unicorn Hooves

Greetings from Astrid’s Nemeton!

We’ve settled in to our digs for the duration of the Great Faire, in the intriguing Realm of Astrid’s Nemeton. It seems to be a mixture of Asatru and Druidic cultures. The denizens here are (mostly) friendly, although some of them have rather large teeth!

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Greetings from Astrid’s Nemeton!

We brought fae steeds, of course, as one can never be too sure what mounts there will be in these far-away and often strange Realms. I spent the first day of the Faire exploring our Realm on horseback: there was so much to see and do! It is possible to hire a boat and sail the waterways that marble the Realm throughout.

We are in a beautiful little house upon which a tree with iridescent leaves grow: this seems to be the style throughout the Realm. These houses remind me of nothing so much as the temple at Angkor Wat, even though those buildings are made of a different kind of stone. I never visited it, but I recall seeing photographs in some class or other at uni, or maybe it was secondary school: my old life seems to run together so much.

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Queue Marlowe did my hair!

Although I’m fortunate enough to be able to visit Queue’s Realm and have her do my hair from time to time, I always look for her braiding and styling booth first of all when we reach the Faire: there is nothing so wonderful as being able to enjoy the Faire in a beautiful new hairstyle and be able to tell people where I got it! She calls this braid style Janire, and I’m sure I’ve met the woman it’s named after somewhere or other. I don’t know why, but I have a strong, sharp memory of the taste of broccoli whenever I think of that name. Perhaps we had memorable broccoli together at some dinner or other? I do like broccoli.

As with all years, I will do my best to share with you, whether or not you can hop Realms as easily as we can, our experiences at the Faire. We’ve been so busy since the Faire opened on Thursday that I’m only just getting around to looking at the photographs I’ve taken. Luckily, the Faire has great wifi and I’m able to post right from our little house!


From Gwen: Co-sponsoring a Fantasy Faire region with LRRiven of Rivendale is such an honour! But it’s also a lot of work! Obviously, Riven as the region designer did so much more than I did, and Kitori Unplugged (aka Skeleton) tirelessly provided so many scripts that made everything Just Work, but the concept we created and the story we worked toward have been building for a year in one form or another. Indeed, we’re already thinking about next year! 

I’m hoping that for the next week I can partially relax, take in the Faire, and share many wonderful pictures and stories with you. Although these photographs were taken on Thursday just before the Faire opened, I’ve been so busy that this is the first chance I’ve had to post anything. 


Coming soon:

More from Astrid’s Nemeton
The Soundtrack of Erstwhile
A cubic *ton of things I haven’t thought of yet!


Style Card:
Body: Maitreya
Head: LAQ Bento Mesh Head, Lulu
Skin: Lumae, Elvi (Nylisa) (Available NOW at the 2018 Relay For Life of Second Life Fantasy Faire, in the Realm Pools of Ethuil!)
Eyes: Banana Banshee, Faelynn (Available NOW at the 2018 Relay For Life of Second Life Fantasy Faire, in the Realm Aetherea!)
Ears: Lumae, Leevi Long Ears
Dress: Noble Creations, Goddess Artemis
Hair: Analog Dog, Janire (Available NOW at the 2018 Relay For Life of Second Life Fantasy Faire, in the Realm Falls of Hope!)
Headpiece: On a Lark, Gardenia Crown
Boots: !go!, Fay Boots Red
Horse: WaterHorse, Riding Horse, English WarmBlood
Horse Skin: Cinnamon, Celestial Pearl
Unicorn Mods: Jinx, Unicorn Set (Not new, but you can get it at the Jinx store in the Fantasy Faire realm of Tiny Town!)
Horse Tack: Aerith Tack FF18 (Available NOW at the 2018 Relay For Life of Second Life Fantasy Faire, in the Realm Tiny Town!)

Location: The 2018 Relay for Life of Second Life Fantasy Faire, Realm of Astrid’s Nemeton, sponsored by Rivendale and Gwen Enchanted, designed by LRRiven.

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