Three Twisted Knots

The signs were clear. Now, in this cloudy dusk, I can’t see the stars at all, but on a clear night, not so long ago, the signs were clear. With night rolling in, and the sgraffito sky making it all feel like celluloid, time seems to slow. Even Good Witches (OK, Not-So-Good Witches) can’t have total control over time: the Wizard stole that from us, as he has stolen so many other things.

Waiting. The stars said I was to meet a young woman, an innocent, who will arrive here via the wind itself. I have never seen anyone travel on the winds, but we’ve got broomsticks, flying monkeys, and bubble transport up in here, so who am I to judge? She also is prophesied to arrive in her own house, which strikes me as a dangerous mode of transport, but young people, amirite?

Sometimes, even though as a Not-So-Good Witch I am subject to the whims of the spirits and the animistic wonder of the Universe, such as it is in the Land of Oz, the places I end up working never fail to disconcert me. Why do we even have a cornfield in Oz? Oz is a fantasy land, and corn is a New World grain (no, it’s not a vegetable!), and frankly the juxtaposition of fairy tale and mundanity is enough to drive a Not-So-Good witch right round the spiral.

I know I appear to be the sweetest Not-So-Good Witch in the Land of Oz, but the truth is, I hate waiting. Where is this little urchin?

Of course, it’s impossible to sit down in a gown like this, so I have to stand or float the whole time, and floating is tiring. Finally, I take out my wand and attempt to dowse her out—at least maybe I’ll get a direction that way.

It takes me a full minute to realise two of the field mice have approached and are chattering at me. I have to cast a glamour on myself so I can understand Fieldmouse just to figure out what they’re saying. Speaking of urchins. Oz is lousy with field mouse. It’s a Land-wide infestation. The Actual Bad Witches love the little troublemakers, and the Not-So-Good Witches are just too nice to kill anything… much.

‘What? Say it again now that I can understand you’, I say.

‘She’s coming’! they both say in unison. It’s creepy how they do that.

‘Yes; I got the portent; thank you’. I’m all set to remove the glamour so I don’t have to listen to their squeaky little voices.

‘But she’s not coming here, Your Glindaness’!

I look up into the dark sky. Gods of the Old World, save me from these plagues. ‘Did she get knocked off course and end up in Narnia’?

‘No, no’! Again with the unison. What, do they share a brain or something? ‘She’s on course to crash right in the central spiral of Munchkinland’!

Once again, I silently beg for deliverance. I fucking hate Munchkinland. First, I think that name is all kinds of problematic, and secondly, the only time my head hurts more is when I’m listening to field mice. Except for that one time some visitor or other put something on the Victrola they proudly proclaimed to be Alvin and the Chipmunks. I sigh. Heavily.

‘How soon’? I ask.

They look at each other. ‘Half an hour tops’, they say. ‘And you’ll have to bubble it, since you gotta go through the Dark Forest to get there’.

‘Thank you; I know the geography’, I say, not without sarcasm.

‘Well, what could be more fun than a luminous bubble ride through the Dark Forest in the middle of the night’? I ask. That’s another thing I hate about Munchkinland. It is always mid-day there. Like, how do they sleep? ‘I guess you two want a lift’.

‘Yes, please, Your Not-So-Good Witchiness’! The pitch rises to a painful and frenzied level.

‘You’re both gonna have to shut it if you travel with me. And I pick the music’.

Silence. I pick silence. Because who knew what’s about to happen to me? It could be utter chaos.

I hope she doesn’t kill anybody with that house of hers.

Notes & Credits:

Items Featured at Enchantment’s Wonderful Wizard of Oz:

• Gown: Ruxy, Glinn
• Star Halo: Kokoro, Halo Stars
• Skin: Loa, Raven in Velour Tone Dracula
• Blush: (eyes, nose, and cheeks) Also Loa (in the skin pack!)
• Eyes: Lovelysweet, Thea Eyes
• Wand: Blue Blood, Emerald Wand
• Backdrop: Dirty Rat, Life’s Crossroads

Other Sponsored Items:

• Hair: Analog Dog (natch!), Maybe. Available at the Analog Dog Main Store.
• Eyeshadow: Hexumbra, Darby Eyeshadow. Available at the Hexumbra Main Store.
• Lipstick: Hexumbra, Ruthann Lipstick. Available at the Hexumbra Main Store.

Other Fancy Stuff:

• Smile Lines: Juniper
• Crow’s feet, eye bags, and forehead lines: Izzie’s
• Eyebrows: Simple Bloom, Paola Up.
• Glinda the Not-So-Good Witch is styled on a Maitreya Mesh Body and a Lelutka EvoX Xia head.